Day 11

You won't believe this. I say it a lot but this time I mean it. There's a manhunt on right now for the man who's been stalking me and a few other girls during the Christmas season. He's been systematically seeking out girls who live alone without their support network nearby and giving them strange gifts. One girl got nothing but greeting cards and figgy pudding every day. I was apparently the worst hit though but I wouldn't give back some of my gifts for the world. I'm so happy to not be alone anymore, not with Patty and my doves. I'm not supposed to write about who he is or what he looks for confidentiality reasons but he is an ex con so what somebody with his mental health issues wanted with these girls... I shudder. Ooh, doorbell! I think it's Miles and he and I are due for a long talk. He brought the doves over yesterday but he couldn't stay long so today I'm going to try and figure out what's going on between us. I like him and he likes me. What does that mean for us? With all this drama my life is just crazy and I'm not sure I can put him through something like this. Is there any way to avoid it though or is the damage already done? He's been by my side for so long and-hang on I'm sorry. There's this weird drumming noise...

Day 10

Dec. 20

Turns out, I have less priority in line than a drunk driver testifying in some tribunal so I finally got my diary back. The next guy on shift after the lady cop took it away as a breach of protocol. Right, the creepy stalker dude is totally reading this. OHMYGOSH what if he actually is?! I need to stop terrifying myself because I already have enough problems. I get out today! Geez that sounds like I’m in jail which I guess I sort of am. No headway on the case so far. No suspects at all. This is apparently very unusual but all I can say is that I want to go home! I’m supposed to keep my face covered though because the story got leaked and now there is literally a price on my head. The first reporter to get a headshot of me gets 250 dollars cash. Time to go now, in a scarf and ugly coat that I hate. If they don’t know what I look like how will they know the photo is genuine?

Wow, that was more than I expected. Apparently this city is full of amateur reporters. Sigh. Just killing time now, waiting until Miles clears the police checkpoints outside my door. Looking out the window always helps to clear my head. It’s so bright this time of year, everything clear and perfect. The skyline’s dotted with Christmas lights and strange clusters of men in traditional costumes- wait, what?

That was the strangest spectacle I have ever seen. Ten men in traditional English costumes did an illegal BASE jump from the building next door. Now that’s ten lords a leaping, nine ladies dancing, eight maids a milking, seven swans a swimming, six geese a laying, five golden rings, four  calling birds, three French hens two turtle doves and partridge in a  pear tree. Also, excellent news! I came back to the apartment to find a box waiting on the door step. After careful scanning and far too much drama they discovered Patty inside the box! She hadn’t been there long so the police went searching but she’s home now! The police think that according to the evidence my love is a man, tall with graying hair. I doubt that more than a little.

Last entry today. Miles came in as I finished the last sentence, so I had to stop writing but I figured I owed you an update. The first thing is that he brought the doves with him and Noelle’s laid her first clutch of eggs! I’m excited to see what they look like but I’m giving her some space. She’s still getting used to being back  with me. Miles had a lot to say about it actually.  Before we could talk seriously his visit was up. Damn this stalker. I want to be free again, free to spend time with whoever whenever not stuck here.

Day 9

Dec. 18

                My life is over. I am finished and alone. I don’t know where I am anymore, because it wouldn’t be safe. The police think that I need protection now, because he knows so much about me. I don’t know who he is and all my family is so far away and I just feel so alone. I’m in a tiny room now. The door isn’t locked, but there’s nowhere I can go. The TV’s broken, stuck on the Korean network and the books are all covered in crayon. Guess all I can do is keep waiting and write in this book. It’s the only thing they let me bring so I may as well put it to good use. What to write though? I can’t write more about where I am, it “wouldn’t be safe” so I guess I’ll just write. Nothing to write, ho hum just sitting in jail waiting for my life to go back to normal. Who am I kidding though? I’ve never been normal. I was always the odd one out, and I’m stuck now. Supposed to get a gift today according to the pattern. Wonder how he’s going to get it through the police barricade? BORED.

                Okay, took a walk around the room.  I’m still upset, but I’m going to take the advice of the cat poster and just chill out. Think happy thoughts and all that. What can I think about that’s happy? Patty’s still missing and Noelle and Gentleman (my doves, remember them?) have gotten colder towards me. They’re staying with Miles and I’m afraid that by the time I’m out of here they’ll- Hang on, door opening.

                You won’t believe what happened after the door opened. It was the lady cop (she’s super nice- always asking me if I’m comfortable, if there’s anything she can do. She even let me borrow her own personal book to read). Anyways, she led me out towards the reception area and Miles was waiting for me! We took a walk in the park together and just being out of that room and with him was beyond anything. There was a ballet demonstration set up, nine beautiful dancers performing scenes from my favorite ballet, The Nutcracker. It had an anonymous sponsor and our police escort looked suspicious but we didn’t have to go back to that awful place. We just walked the winding paths aimlessly talking about Christmases back home. Both of us are away from our families this year so we might even be spending Christmas morning together. Just open up little gifts and eat junky cereal. Even that wasn’t the best part though. As we walked by the pond he leaned towards me and he just took my hand in his. My cool hand surrounded by his warm one was a magical feeling. What do you say to something like that? So we walked together, hand in hand. My life right now is terrible, and the cot I’m lying on his harder than the floor but there’s always a little brightness in the darkness. 

Day 8

Dec. 16

Where do I start? Should I talk about the heart wrenching sadness of knowing that even though I’ve only had her for two weeks, my apartment is now partridge free? It seems really silly now, I guess to be so sad about a partridge. Still, I don’t want to be so depressing. I need some cheer in my life right now, so let’s talk about Miles. Miles who actually wrote in my diary that he thinks I am beautiful. It is the sweetest thing anybody has ever done for me. Even in high school, I never got the greatest guys. Something about me just screamed PLEASE MAKE ME PAY FOR EVERYTHING AND GOD FORBID ANYBODY ACTUALLY LIKE ME! I don’t know why but there was always just this sense of not being worth anything, and those trashy guys just made it worse for me. I really regret what happened then, and I hope I get the chance to redeem myself. Miles make me feel as though I’m worth it.

                Old ladies at the door. My grandmother? Crud, she’s coming this way.

                Okay, I probably need to explain. That was my grandmother and her knitting circle at the door. She lives in a nearby residential facility, but she used to have her own home. I lived with her in university and we used to be really close. We got into a huge fight over the care home though, and she hadn’t spoken to me since she entered. She came over today though, to visit her favorite granddaughter (her only granddaughter) with all seven of the other women in her group. Eight old maids milking me for every bit of information about my life was a very pleasant afternoon, especially after Miles made his way into my apartment (he changed the locks for me, but still has a key). I am bushed, but the way he responded to ALL their questions was so nice! He sat down with us and had a cup of tea, speaking clearly and slowly so that everyone could hear.

                I miss Patty, Miles is spending the night again, but I’m going to bring him some more blankets. He was cold last night, and maybe we can have a cup of cocoa before bed. Horribly stereotypical? Maybe, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a good idea. Good night!

Day 7

Dec. 14

                Okay, very excited for today! Still early, but I figured I’d write something quick because I feel like it’s been a while since I wrote and I owe you an update. I’ve got the day off while they “revaluate their situation” which basically means I’m getting fired, but I really don’t care. A few nights ago, last time I wrote I said I was going to go get a cup of tea, right? Well for once, that’s actually all that happened. You know how there are always those rom-coms that have somebody up and vulnerable in the middle of the night and they have a beautiful discussion about life and each other? Unless you count his snoring and my absentminded humming, the only person I talked to was Patty. Hey, she totally counts. Anyways, I just feel really happy today, not sure why. Miles isn’t even here today, he has to work. He’s training to be a nurse of some sort, geriatric maybe? I’ve been spending more time with him lately, but not a creepy amount. He’s really nice. Bye now, need to get a laundry machine before they all fill up. J

I don’t even know where to start my day is just so messed up now. My life went from being happy, with laundry soap and Christmas carols to the police and tears and okay I just need to breathe.

                Wow, this is the most awkward moment. I’ve now written not once but twice in my neighbour’s diary. You wanted me to write out what happened, and I’ll do my best.

                The young woman, living on her own for the first time walked up the stairs, a laundry basket in her arms. She is tall, wearing loose, faded jeans and a green shirt with a Christmas tree on the front. She stops at the apartment labelled 1243 and shifts the basket to her hip to unlock the door. There is no need to, as it swings open at the lightest touch. She steps inside cautiously, watching her feet to avoid stepping on one of her many birds. She doesn’t see them. She almost misses the package sitting on the front table, seeing it at the last possible moment. She stifles a scream, especially at seeing the bright tag on the top. She knows what it says and does not approach. She calls the police first, and her caring, very attractive-ow! Why’d you hit me? Sorry, geez. Anyways, she calls her neighbour.

                Inside the box is a beautiful set of crystal swans, inlaid into a deep sapphire pond. They have miniscule golden gears, and are clearly very expensive. It is kept as evidence. The note is clearly foreboding, warning her that she will love him and that her partridge will be kept by him until she does. Finally, all the police leave the home. There is nothing else they can do, though they promise to keep the file open and investigate more. The girl, left alone with her neighbour in the empty apartment leans against him, and very gently begins to cry against him. She hates to do it, has always felt that somebody truly brave shouldn’t cry. She is the bravest woman I have ever met.

Day 6

Dec. 12

                I am going to collapse into my bed in about thirty seconds but I just had to scribble this down before I forget to. After work (I finally got a job as a temp!)  I went for a walk in the cute little park down the street. I’m on a really tiny salary still trying to pay off student loans and this is not the greatest neighbourhood so of course Miles, ever the gentleman  insisted on coming with me.  We saw the beautiful Christmas decorations, and even the Nativity set at the community church. It hasn’t been vandalized yet, which is something that really warms my heart. I know it isn’t quite Christmas yet, but it’s still so nice to see people remembering that they aren’t the only ones on earth. When we got back to our apartments though, I almost had a panic attack. I screamed so loud that he literally came running in from next door and the guy upstairs called the police.

                What I found out on my balcony was what looked like six dead geese. They were lying there in dark puddles and I almost puked. Miles was brave enough to go take a closer look at them, despite my fervent cries of ohmygoshdon’tgo and discovered that they are apparently stuffed. Six taxidermied geese just lying on my balcony. A whole bunch of stuff happened at once as he came back in and I’m still trying to get things in order. First, Miles came back from the balcony and all that. He’s actually about to call the police, literally with his cell phone in hand when the police come. They actually almost smashed down the door before I could sprint to open it. There was a whole thing about how the hell he got it up onto my twelfth floor balcony (they think he/she knows somebody in the building) but the end result was that Miles is spending the night on my couch, just to make sure that nothing happens. I’m not even sure how this happened, everything’s a blur. We’re both really afraid right now, much as I hate to admit it. This situation went from something weird to something really quite terrifying. I almost forgot to mention- there was a note alongside the six geese. This guy just seems to have caught the writing bug. It said (the police took it)

                “My dear, my love for you shines as bright as the noon day sun in the arctic winter. I will be with you soon and I will have you as mine forever. I love you so much more than you could ever imagine. You must be thrilled with your gifts by the way you treat them. How’s Patty? – Your true love”

                I am so afraid right now I actually did something I haven’t done since I was a little girl. I prayed. I never saw the point in praying to some invisible super hero before but now? I need all the help I can get to overcome this. I’m probably not going to be able to sleep tonight, so I’m going to go make some herbal tea. Maybe it’ll soothe my nerves. 

Day 5

Dec. 10

                Okay, I probably owe you a bit of explanation as to why there’s some random dude writing in my diary, beyond the one he already gave. Patty is NOT scary Miles, just a little… intimidating. I’m sorry about not writing sooner, but I’ve actually been working on creating an actual room for the doves. I’m really glad I met Miles actually. It was a total fluke that he was so cold and wet that he actually hit my button by accident, instead of Mme deFourchette’s but he wound up coming over to my place until the super could come back and let him in. No matter how much it sounds like a date, it was really not. He was literally shivering, so I let him take a shower, gave him a blanket and my brother’s old robe from when he was like, 15. I seriously don’t know why I still have that, but Miles seemed to warm up quickly. I’ll write a brief description, which I’m supposed to be practicing for my online course.

                The boy- no the man at my door was shivering, drenched to the bone. Even though he was already shaking, I could see a tangled mop of dark curls and bluish lips covering chattering teeth. Still staring at the floor, his freckled features seemed frozen into an expression of surprise. Later, when he was dry his hair lightened to a dusty brown and his amber eyes sparkled. As the Polar Express theme played, his eyes lit up like a child’s and he exclaimed in delight. He was modest and very shy but you should have seen how he reacted to the dove cage. I think his mom must have kept birds or something, because he was completely shocked at the idea of keeping my birds inside like that. Like I said, that’s what we were doing yesterday is fixing up the dove cage- sorry Aviary. All that happened today was, randomly enough, I received five onion rings. Weird, huh? I invited Miles over also, after ordering more food so I could tell him about my newest (and weirdest) gift. Oh, there’s the doorbell now, Bye!